You're so mind-controlled and you don't even know it

To all who live in constant fear of that most personal invasion -- mind control -- the most time-honored line of defense has now fallen into disrepute. It turns out that tin-foil hats not only fail to protect the wearer from malevolent broadcasts, but actually AMPLIFY signals in the range most commonly used by the Government. Using a $250,000 signal generator, researchers have all but proven Reynolds foil is useless as a prophylactic against "The Voices" (especially if The Voices use the same radio frequencies as GPS sattellites!).

Thanks to that juggernaut of scientific advancement, MIT, maybe we can soon rest a little easier... that is, if they ever develop a technology to actually keep the invisible rays out of our heads.